A Writing Exercise On Regret

This year has not gone as I had expected.  I'm sure everyone can say that. In January,  I didnt even know what "social distancing" meant. Now it is a term we are forced to keep ever present on our minds as we navigate the day.
I spend most of my time alone now. No more journaling at the coffee shop, browsing through books at the library or going out for drinks with friends.
I am forced to reach into my thoughts - a limited repository of scattered memories and regrets mostly.
This is the year I turned 50. So, I can categorize my adult reflections by decades - my 20s, my 30s, my 40s. Time to bare my soul.
It is an exercise I can undertake without much interruption since we aren't able to go out and do much.
Regret. Regret. Regret. So much during each decade.
I've only been 50 for about a month. But, I already could fill a notebook writing about the regrets I have regarding just the last few weeks.
So let's begin.

Is This For Real?

I'm tired of the news. I'm getting fat watching Netflix.
Now what?
This is nothing like I have ever been through before. I remember  Y2K.
A joke.
I remember 9-11.
That was horrible,  but in a different way.
I dont know if I will survive  after today. I could breathe an invisible terrorist that would kill me and all I am exposed to.
So... in some ways I have had to think about what's important.  What do I treasure? What do I love? What do I want to hold on to like there's no tomorrow- in case there isn't.
And so... I think of relationships with those I care about. That is what I want to focus on while I can... in case....